Why are boys, yourselves included, such obnoxious prats? Especially brothers. They expect their sister to remain celibate until marriage just because they haven't even been kissed. Mothers too. I am not a child. Oh and another person, let's call her 'Phlegm' for now, she thinks she is God's gift because her grandmother is a Veela. Seriously, try using that peanut-sized thing in your head called a BRAIN! My brother could do much better.
Padfoot: We're not going to answer all the comment we receive because we are too lazy we get so many. And it is hard to answer EVERYONE SINGLE ONE OF THEM! Ah. The price of popularity.
:rolls eyes:
Prongs: Now, we give you the honour of Peter's school photo!
Whatever I do isn't good enough for my Lord. I do everything within my power to prove my worth but he just ignores me. My husband is now in Azkaban and I think now is the chance to tell Him how I really feel. Perhaps I should crucio a few muggles just to please him if all goes wrong? What do you think?
Prongs: Sssh! I'm writing this down, for future reference.
God, don't read too much into it! She did push you into eternal darkness.
Padfoot: But you agreed with me.
I thought we had already established that?
Lupin: What was this doing in the kitchen? :holds up letter:
Prongs: What does it say?
::grabs note:: Nothing. At all.
Lupin: You promised! You swore that you would never, ever, ever do it again!
Shut up! You said you wouldn't say anything.
Lupin: And you said you wouldn't write to him any more. He's a Death Eater, in case you didn't notice.
Really? I thought he was a fluffy rabbit.
Lupin: HE HAS A FAMILY! HE TRIED TO KILL HARRY AND IS ROTTING IN AZKABAN PRISON!
::storms out of room::
::All look at Lupin::
Lupin: Ask her.
::Pokes head round door:: If you must know, I was helping Narcissa get in contact with him! Ok? Happy now? Finished suspecting me for everything? HAVE YOU?! JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE SNEAKING AROUND IT DOESN'T MEAN WE ALL ARE.
It's nearly Christmas, and I have not a clue as to what gift would suit my boyfriend. I have thought long and hard about what to get him, however I am at a loss. I want to show him that I love him but without becoming too possessive. I thought about giving some flea-repellent or a bone/chew toy.
Clueless were-boy.
_______________________________________________
I thought I told you not to write for advice FROM YOURSELF?!
Lupin: To whom was that question directed?
You! Really I thought you were more intelligent than this! :points to letter:
Lupin: Where is your evidential proof?
In my hand. We all know your boyfriend is Black!
Padfoot: I thought I granted you the privilege to call me Sirius.
OMGZ! U iz al lke soo sexy! OMg y did Serious and Jmes die? Serious is wl sexy e is lke da bst EVAH! OMG! Wormtail dat iz lke SO tight of you lke! Lupes, i wl luv werewolves i mn ther wl gd i mn it mst b wl fn lke to chnge in2 1 lke. OMGZ! I wsh i cd mt u al cept Wormtail myb i dnt lke im v. mch bcoz e is a btryer. OMG! luv ya all like wll lds! Mwa
Padfoot: :smirks: Ahh just one billionth of my female following.
Lupin: She didn't even spell your name correctly, Serious, honestly.
Who says it's a she?
Prongs: I can't read it. Can anyone possibly decipher it for me?
Ummm
Prongs: :Rolls eyes:
Lupin: My guess is:
Oh my god(z)! You is all so sexy! Oh my god why did Sirius and James die? Sirius is well sexy he is like the best ever! Wormtail that is like so tight of you, like! Lupin, I well love werewolves I mean they're well good, I mean it must be well fun to change into one, like. Oh my god (z)! I wish I could meet you all except Wormtail maybe, I don't like him very much because he is a betrayer. Oh my god! Love you all well loads! (I interpret this as a kiss)
Seriously in love, like.
Lupin: :shudder:
Lupes?
Lupin: I was just thinking who this could be from.
I think I am head over-heels in love with a group (4) of boys. Just the way they are supremely cool, and show other people who're boss. ::swoon::
Also do you know where you can buy thongs? My old greying bloomers are getting worn out!
Snivellus Hook-nosed Professor.
_______________________________________________ Prongs: Amy, I applaud you.
What can I say?
Padfoot: Well, hook-nosed, sour-faced, sallow-skinned, greasy-haired, milk-bottle Professor, I suggest you buy one of those thongs with pink fluff on. As to where you find them I don't know.
What should he do with the group of boys that he's fallen in love with?
Prongs: Stop stalking them. Stop insulting them. And never, ever EVER come on to them. EVER.
Lupin: Sell those pictures to the press and I'll get Skeeter to have a one to one interview with Pettigrew, so he can reveal ALL.
This group of Slytherins have been bullying me to try and do something terrible, sell out my best friends. I don't want to do it, but they'll kill me otherwise! What should I do?
How do you get rid of someone that won't leave you alone? No matter how many times I insult him or threaten to hex him, his fat head follows me around wherever I go. Trying to be it with his hair all ruffled and playing with that goddamn snitch that he stole from the quidditch cupboard. Grrr, he just gets under my skin.
Green-Eyed Girl
________________________________________
Padfoot: ...well...I...er...
Wormtail: :shuffles:
Lupin: :clears throat:
:silence:
James...?
:banging door:
Lupin: Well, Green-Eyed Girl, perhaps you shouldn't be so hard on this 'fat-head' perhaps he likes you but isn't too good on showing his feelings...
Padfoot: Yeh, this anonymous person probably only nicked the snitch because one of his mates dared him to. Maybe.
I think I'll go find James
Lupin: No, let him cool off a bit.
Wormtail: Umm...I...er...what's the matter with James?
There's a girl I like... I'm a Slytherin but she's a Gryffindor. I really like her, but I don't think she even knows I exist. Also an intolerable boy has made it impossible for me to walk anywhere without getting jinxed. How do I speak to this girl? And do I dispose of this dung beetle? It's not my fault that my hair becomes greasy after leaning over a cauldron all day.
Potions Prince
_________________________________________________
Prongs: Go wash your underwear Snive- Potions Prince. And keep your filthy hands off the Gryffindor girl.
Shut up James. Don't be so nasty.
Prongs: Well why don't you go and make HIM write this advice column if you're so in love with the greaseball!
You don't know what you're talking about
Prongs: I saw you yesterday. Staring at him, it's disgusting.
I wasn't! Anyway what were you doing? Spying on me? Lily turned you down again did she?
Someone has recently stolen a map from my private office and I need to know it's whereabouts. I've informed the headmaster and he doesn't take in a word I say. How do I get people to listen to me? Umbridge was the only teacher that took in what I said about bringing back the old punishments. What should I do?
Crabby Caretaker.
__________________________________________________________ Padfoot: Leave the school. Leave the country.
:elbow: Helpful information.
Padfoot: Don't elbow me woman!
James: *huff*
Padfoot: Still upset ickle Jamesikins?
James: Shut up.
Perhaps we can get back on topic? I didn;t get you to write this for nothing you know.
Lupin: I agree with Sirius, resign in protest.
So much for the being the sensible one
Wormtail: Or, y-y-ou could just keep quiet!
Padfoot: Yeh, that's a GREAT suggestion. Just leave the school, obviously no-one wants you there.
