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#未来に向けた挑戦 (6)英語版  A Challenge Toward the Future

Living Across Boundaries

The Life of a Woman Teacher



I was born in Osaka, in an area called Abeno—
a city of concrete, buildings pressed tightly together.

I grew up without knowing fields or rice paddies.
I did not even know that there was a season
when water fills the rice fields.

Yet the place itself was deeply liberal.
The teachers were liberal.
The atmosphere was liberal.
It felt normal.

In high school, many teachers still carried the weight of war.
Anti-war education was direct and unapologetic.
Some social studies teachers even raised red flags in class.
At the time, I did not think it unusual.
I believed this was simply what education was.

I went to Kobe, a place I had long admired.
At university, the first thing we were taught was Marx.
Some professors in the faculty of education openly said,
“Teachers are unnecessary.”

Within that environment,
I attended an English school at night.
I raised my TOEFL score,
worked part-time,
and when I had saved enough to study abroad,
I chose what was possible and studied in the United States for one year.

It was a shock.

More than anything, I could not hear.
Sounds reached my ears, but meaning did not follow.
That experience changed my focus entirely.
What is language?
What does it mean to listen?
These questions began to define me.

I wanted to become a researcher.

But my father retired,
and at twenty-five,
my mother cried and asked me to find a job.

I became a public high school teacher in Osaka.

During my years in Kobe,
I became close to an American female missionary.
While baking cakes together,
I grew interested in Christianity
and joined a liberal missionary organization.

In my final year of graduate school,
I was asked to teach aerobics at a camp in Manza—
a skill I had learned in the United States.
There, I met a man from Shizuoka.
He later became my husband.

After I was hired as a teacher,
he wrote to me every day.
“If you have become a teacher,” he said,
“please marry me.”

After much hesitation,
I retook the teacher certification exam—
this time in Shizuoka.
It felt easy.
I passed.

Marriage marked the moment
I became an outsider.

I was criticized for planning a honeymoon.
The day after my wedding,
during a meeting with the principal,
I was told,
“We don’t need people from such liberal places.”

From that day on, I could no longer sleep.

I visited a mental health clinic.
I was told it was an emotional response
to a drastic change in environment.
I had no choice but to adapt.

Then I became pregnant.
After giving birth to my first child,
I developed facial nerve paralysis.

Still, when I held my child for the first time,
I thought—almost against my will—
that giving this child two languages
might be my mission as a mother.

After returning from maternity leave,
I became a homeroom teacher and eventually graduated my students.
It was exhausting,
but it gave me a sense of purpose.

As I grew older,
my responsibilities increased.

Entrance exam preparation became routine.
At a commercial high school,
I was ordered by the principal
to build a TOEIC preparation program from scratch.

There were no precedents.
Yet I delivered results.
Students achieved high scores
and connected them to their future paths.

Still, I faced hostility—
from within my own English department,
as well as sudden policy reversals
when a new principal arrived.

The pressure intensified.

Eventually, I fell into depression
and began psychiatric treatment.

To survive,
I obtained a national license in acupuncture and moxibustion.
I needed something that was mine alone,
beyond teaching.

I was transferred to an academic high school.
There, I faced my own further unraveling.

Nevertheless, I endured.
I completed my career and retired.

The year before retirement,
I was diagnosed with early-stage stomach cancer
and underwent endoscopic surgery.
It was successful.

Looking back,
I see that I have lived my life crossing boundaries.

Between regions.
Between languages.
Between cultures.
Between roles.

And now,
with my own money and my own judgment,
I am choosing where and how I will live the final chapter of my life.

This is not defeat.
It is the act of reclaiming my life.

This is also my Challenge Toward the Future.

#MyLife
#WomenInEducation
#LivingAcrossBoundaries
#LanguageAndIdentity
#MentalHealthJourney
#BurnoutAndRecovery
#LifeAfterRetirement
#ReclaimingMyLife

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