Overheard in BrisVegas

Electronic voice.

dragonflysakura — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 07:36:36 GMT

Overhead at Southbank today:

Girl 1: I hate Dannii Minogue. And Kyle Sandilands. And...and...that other judge.
Girl 2: Brian McFadden?
Girl 1: Yeah! Brian McFadden! I HATE HIM SO MUCH!
Girl 2: Yeah...
Girl 1: I HATE that song of his. He's a terrible singer. He has an electronic voice for crying out loud!
Girl 2: Um...

Are you sure it has nothing to do with your year 8 reading level?

hammond — Tue, 20 Apr 2010 10:10:29 GMT

Overheard in a book shop:

"Girl: I wont read anything that isn't twilight because i know it won't be as good. "

Heaven in Brisbane?

buzzgirl19 — Sun, 17 Jan 2010 05:09:04 GMT

Overheard at the big pedestrian crossing on the corner of Adelaide and Edward.

Little boy (about 5yo): There's too many people here!
Grandma: *nods*
Little boy: Are we in heaven?
Grandma (absently): No, we're not in heaven.
Little boy (sounding wistful and confused): But there are so many people...

At the Borders/McDonald's crossing in the city

popcultaddict — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 09:32:23 GMT

Excited geeky guy: [blah, blah, blah]...Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
Girl: I don't know who that is.
Excited geeky guy: He wrote the Adventures of Sherlock Holmes.
Girl: ...
Excited geeky guy: He also wrote The Lost World.
Girl: Oh, you mean Jurassic Park?
Excited geeky guy: ....No. Not Jurassic Park.

Not smoking?

hammond — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 01:41:19 GMT

Overheard behind me in a lecture theatre:

Guy 1: I thought you quit smoking.

Guy 2: I did! I don't smoke during the day

2 overheard exchanges

fifteensixty — Sat, 28 Feb 2009 09:42:38 GMT

In Coles at West End...

Mother: Ok, what else is on the shopping list?
Little girl: Friends.
Mother: What?
Little girl: Can we buy friends?
Mother: You don't buy friends.
Little girl: Daddy says you can.
Mother: Daddy says a lot of things.

And on the 109 bus...

Girl 1: (whispering loudly to Girl 2) I don't know how they work!
Girl 2: I don't know either. Ask someone!
Girl 1: (to passenger across the aisle) Excuse me. How do buses... work. Like, what do I do to make it stop when I want it to stop?
Passenger: Just press the button.
Girl 1: What button?
Passenger: That one. (Points to one of the many bright red buttons)
Girl 1: That's a BUTTON?! (She sounds like her world has just been rocked to its foundations)
Passenger: Yes...
Girl 1: So if I press that thing, the bus stops?
Passenger: Yeah, it'll stop at the next bus stop.
Girl 1: Really? Really?
Passenger: Yeah...
Girl 1: (to Girl 2) We just have to press this thing, I think it's a button!
Girl 2: Really? And the bus will stop? Wow.

They successfully got off the bus at South Bank.

We're American.

hammond — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 06:14:40 GMT

On Sunday night, we were leaving Friday's (shuttup, don't ask) when 2 random tourists yelled at us:
Girl 1: "Hey, you! Take our photo; we're from the States!"
Me: "Yeah, sure"
Girl 1: "We're American, we don't know anything!"
*friends and I crack up laughing*
Girl 2: "Yeah, we're so ignorant"

The latter was less drunk and I think appreciated the humour of the situation. Not to mention they were asking me, an early twenties gay guy, where the hot, straight, 30-something men could be found... on a Sunday night.

Posted via LiveJournal.app.

fifteensixty — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 10:06:48 GMT

A bunch of high school students were on the train, having a standard high school student conversation, then...

Girl 1: (suddenly yelling) Why the fuck should I know what a flamingo is?!
Girl 2: What? You don't know what a flamingo is?
Girl 1: No! I'm not a bogan!
Girl 2: Why would a bogan know what a flamingo is?
Girl 1: Because bogans sit around studying animals and nature and shit! Fuck, I don't know!

What?

fifteensixty — Sat, 27 Dec 2008 07:10:55 GMT

On the Cleveland train...

Teenage boy: I go to a Lutheran school and we have 45 minutes of chapel every day so we learn heaps about our religion, and we have religious education classes as well as chapel. Lutheran is basically better than all the other religions.
Little girl: What's Lutheran?
Teenage boy: Well, we're different from the other religions because we have pastors instead of priests. And... what else do we have? Umm... yeah... I don't know. But we have pastors instead of priests, which makes everything a lot more... good.
Little girl: (looks out the window) Wow this train is fast.

Ahh, religion.

For the love of..

hammond — Fri, 26 Dec 2008 13:35:45 GMT

A girl in a medical supplies shop talking to a young customer about her puppy:

Kid: Do you like my new puppy?
Girl: It's adorable, is it a Christmas present?
Kid: We don't believe in Christmas; I love Jehovah!

She sounded so happy with herself too.

On the 385

mokmok — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 23:13:11 GMT

Cross-posted from brisneyland:

Overhead on a BCC bus yesterday, when the drivers changed over:

Driver 1: You running a bit late?
Driver 2: Three or four minutes. Had to stop at Queen St to get the back door sensor fixed - they dodgied it up with a zip tie and some masking tape.

Orange vs. Green

hammond — Sat, 13 Sep 2008 02:21:11 GMT

Girl talking to her friend on the train:

"I hate train tickets because they're orange. Bus tickets are green and so are obviously better."

Overheard at Work

kittysuck — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 14:33:53 GMT

A cute boy + girl talking at my coffee shop::

Boy:: Is Gorge spelt the same as George?
Girl:: No, because then it would be George.

On the 121.

buzzgirl19 — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 12:24:33 GMT

A first year uni student guy and a working girl who know each other (maybe from high school?) meet up unexpectedly on the bus. They're chatting about uni.

Guy: Well, I wanna get all 7s...
GIrl: Do you have any yet?
Guy: Two so far.
Girl: I guess it's pretty easy to get a 7, hey?
Guy: Um, not that easy...

On the 381.

hammond — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 06:24:24 GMT

Two schoolkids are sitting near me and chatting. One is a senior and the other is a junior:

Junior: What sort of things do you learn in maths C?
Senior: One of the first things you learn is how to find variables in non-right-hand triangles. There's this thing called the Sine Rule -
Lowers his voice in the air of imparting great wisdom
- Now I wouldn't tell you this if I didn't think you could handle it... (he then goes on to explain).

stalker

krosp — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 05:52:46 GMT

While sitting near two teenage girls in Subway:

"We weren't stalking him - we just followed him everywhere he went! It's not like we looked up his address in the phone book."

In a café

hammond — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 04:21:06 GMT

Woman telling her friends: I don't drink coke; it sucks the calcium right out of your bones!

RBH corridor

hana_broom — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 04:09:13 GMT

Him: Are you right?
Her: No, I'm half left.

Overheard On the 174

kittysuck — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 08:54:33 GMT

Boy:: Why aren't they friends?
Girl:: Because Jack is jerk + Bettyy's mean
Boy:: If I had my balls removed + you had you're ovaries cut out, would we still be friends?
-Silence-
Boy:: I mean, would we still talk?

hammond — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 05:32:42 GMT

Guy in café talking about how most people associate computers and Internet with pain:

Most people can't even use their TV remote controls. They press the up and down arrows instead of pressing the 7 button from 9.

He then went on to talk about creative centres being on the outside of the brain because they get more blood or something crazy like that. A true expert on everything...

True, 'tis

sesquipedeviant — Sun, 30 Dec 2007 03:19:36 GMT

Context: A night in early December. Post-staff dinner, Garuva's, Fortitude Valley. Another woman and I pay first and slip outside to wait for the others in the cool breeze.
Another lady is waiting there, looking a little unsettled. She's mid-thirties, conservatively dressed. She's looking for friends, it seems, and has been slightly disturbed by the cultural makeup of the Valley. Goodness, she says, there's gay men everywhere now!
"Yes," my friend serenely observes, "both of my husbands are gay."

Daily?

hammond — Tue, 09 Oct 2007 11:34:22 GMT

This morning I got on the bus and asked for a zone 1-2 concession, single. His reply baffled me:

"Single, yes? Did you want a daily?"

Umm... no. I'm pretty sure I would have asked for one if I wanted one.

Overheard in Mens Shoes, Myer

jkarabella — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 20:07:27 GMT

[Customer inspecting the selection of discount shoes available, as per standard only the right shoe is available for inspection]

Customer: "What sizes do you have available?"
Clerk: "Just the ones on the table."
Customer: "Okay... if we buy 'em we get the left one too right?"

Non sequitur of the year

sesquipedeviant — Tue, 24 Apr 2007 16:45:38 GMT

C.K. and I were shopping in Diva Jewellery, when she made a beeline towards an unusual pearl necklace. "I've got a diamante one of these!" she said. "A lesbian licked it!"

sesquipedeviant — Mon, 26 Mar 2007 09:16:28 GMT

Very snappily dressed angry mid-twenties office-worker, click-clacking her way down the street in stylish stilettos as she snapped into her phone:

"I think he's... like... you know, ADD or summing, 'cause he spent all evening pouring his drink over Adam's head!"

[further discussion, garbled by traffic noise]

"He just kept putting [...] everything onto the barbecue! His beer on the barbecue, [someone's] mobile on the barbecue!"