Writer's Block: Public Transit Nightmare

Perhaps the time when I had two ned girls behind me and they saw one of their ex-boyfriends and she remarked "He wiz eh las person a shagged!", to which her friend asked "How long ago wiz that?", and recieved the reply "Aww boot free month noo!", and then retorteded with "Fuck sake man, you must be gaggin fur it!" .  The conversation then proceeded to discuss other various sordid details of the sex life of the two "girls" which, quite frankly, I didn't need to hear!

OR

Perhaps it was the time where some drunk guy who had, and I quote, "Two hoff boatles ae buckie n sum weed man" (yes that's right, two half bottles, not a whole bottle!) kept asking if he could buy my blazer off me!  When he asked how much I paid for it, I told him £70 and he was like "Aye right ye fuckin did mate, looks iz tho it cost aboot a fiver!" and then continues to annoy me about my blazer!  

I could go on about other various funny public transport stories...that's what happens when you get the bus/train to school/work! lol