A star fell – and so as this moment. Exclaimed as she saw one, I followed it up saying, “Say a prayer”. None of us planned nor expected it, nothing but the great Author. A humble plot twist.

We were home resting from various places and friends we’ve visited the past couple of weeks. A perfect time to pause for a while, savor some lone time together and cherish it. With the relaxing view in front, we’re enjoying every chat, story and laughter together at the rooftop. While the both of us were in the hype of appreciating things, the small town around started to seem like they’re watching us – no eyes but structures and lights in trance of our delight. My heart began to beat faster as I hear a familiar voice from within just like the first time we met, a sudden thought came rushing to my head, “It’s time”. I immediately understood what He meant. I wasn’t sure though, but all I know at that point was, I couldn’t let the chance slip. I had to blindly obey and see how it will turn out. I discreetly excused myself and acted like in need to use the restroom. Rushing to the bedroom, I carelessly dumped everything out of the way and dug in through the pile of clothes, books and journals. I hastily snuck time and got the tiny box hidden beneath my personal stash. Feeling cold yet sweating profusely at the same time, adrenaline kicked in bad enough that I had to change my shirt and still try not to act obvious. I came back trying to cover an uncomfortably bulging side pocket for hiding the ring. I felt awkward but also the relief knowing it wasn’t noticed at all, not until I was caught in a no-turning-back scenario.

We went up the watchtower and resumed our conversation. Eventually, she started to become so amazed in the wonders of the overlooking view from the height we’re on. It’s when she couldn’t help but to record a random video clip like she usually does whenever she feels like keeping a memento. She popped the question she always asks, “Do you have anything to say?”. I knew I’ve heard this question multiple times, but why is it sounding strangely odd to me? It’s as if we’re being orchestrated in a sweet setup, once again. But I responded anyway – in a totally unexpected way.

Her glee was radiating while continuously recording the astounding scenic view in sight. “This is it”, I thought. I’m pretty sure of what’s inside my pocket but pulling something out of it never felt the same way. I slowly showed her the tiny box. Her gaze dramatically turned. She was silenced. “What is that?”, she asked with a shaking voice. Tears started to fill her eyes as I gently kneel before her and began uttering words. I was never really straightforward when asking another person for something I badly want, but this time, I finally did – to someone I want to be with for the rest of my life. She set her phone aside, and tearfully answered “Of course, yes” then hugged me. It’s been 4 years since we first met, being away from each other was never easy and she’ll be leaving soon. There’s so much things to ponder on, but all that mattered at the moment was we’re together. I finally held her hand and slid the ring. It was breathtaking.

We laughed and cried while exchanging our confessions of love and honest affirmations. Sparks flew, alive and invisible. The moment was surreal. The horizon full of lights, the nightsky filled with heavenly bodies, her eyes above all. We were underneath a glorious universe, yet it felt like we own one. No pretension nor anything grandiose. Plain and simple. Just us, just His grace – just as perfect are His ways.

It’s embarassing to realize how often I did talk to myself about it in pages and in prayers back then. I wasn’t showy, a bit of interested, kinda unsure, almost elusive, mostly cryptic, passably sound. But I was as normal as everybody else, I am, still – a human who would love to love and be loved – because He first loved us. As I ponder how has it been several years ago, I’ve read some journal entries, which I can hardly remember I even wrote. There’s this one entry I was amazed on how it was fulfilled and became real exactly 3 years ago.

“Why does true love wait?”

“Why? Because admittedly, I do not know who or what kind of person I’d really want to be with. So why not wait? I’d rather turn to this fact that I haven’t found that person yet, and believe this truth that the more I keep my heart in His perfect peace, unawarely, it’s this one person’s heart whom I’m getting closer with. It’s like time, space and everything in between are slowly making a way from the backstage to present the best ever piece they’ll ever show – a masterpiece of love crafted with hope and patience. That will be the time when everything will make sense, and maybe the time I’ll meet her.”

No one: …

God: …

The setting:

Yeah, it’s when I met her.

It was a busy summer evening.

After a long day of duty, we went straight to the mall for us to plan and prepare the program and materials needed for our unit’s upcoming team building activity. I was with the two other game masters: the manager and the fellow. Being the only guy in the group, they do almost everything and there I was, carrying the stuff we have bought and always at the back. It’s a manly thing, I guess. I was excited at the time, yet a strange feeling has been keeping me bothered the past couple of days. A conscious anxiety that I couldn’t describe nor pay attention to. While we were on the escalator, I had my arms rested for a moment putting down the things I’ve been holding and had a quick check on my phone. I wasn’t really expecting anything. But an almost never, a very seldom thing happened, I saw a notification pop-up on my Instagram. I curiously tapped. And then, I died inside.

An account of what exactly happened two years ago: The Blue Turned Gray

Two days have passed since that orchestrated fate – as I call it, happened. Forty-eight hours of nothing but searching, and waiting – when that notification changed everything.

It all started when a total stranger crossed along my path that day. A fierce-looking tiny girl casually appeared in front of me during my not-so-unusual day at work. Eyeglasses, denim jacket, and a book. She looks stubborn and irritated, it seemed like she’s having a bad day and it caught my attention. She’s a daughter of one of the scheduled patients during the day who underwent an endoscopy procedure. Because of her familiar presence, I got to observe her in a short while and thought she’s just another random person to meet and pass by everyday. But deep inside, there’s something in her that I instantly felt during that moment we encountered. I wasn’t sure how and why, but all I know was, there’s a resounding voice in my head saying, “it’s her”. I was never certain on such, but it felt like God was telling me something.

Meanwhile, not long after we met, her father’s procedure was already finished. They suddenly disappeared. She was no where in sight. A weird feeling as if a portion of myself was taken. I couldn’t stop thinking about this stranger I totally know nothing about but words in my head I’m not even sure. Then a strong conviction covered me in a heart-pounding questions. “What if she’s a person I would regret not trying to reach out?”, “What if she’s worth knowing more than just passing by?” I wasn’t sure if I’ll ever have a chance to meet her again and I felt that I couldn’t just let this possibility slip by.

That same day, I started finding out who this person was. I intently searched for her starting from the only information I have on hand – her father’s name. I searched on different social media platforms such as Facebook and Instagram but I couldn’t find any. I tried to input the name in every possible way, interchanging, twisting and turning, but still failed to. I decided to be more thorough by looking up every person’s profile one by one who has the same last name as her father’s, even every friends of friends in each person’s profile I was ending up with. I almost gave up, until I found a profile to whom I sensed that I’m heading somewhere. I checked the photos in every album and found a photo with her on it. I can clearly remember how she looks like. She wasn’t tagged on the photo but a name was mentioned in the caption. I tried searching the name I got, but still, no profile was found. I looked on Instagram, and finally found her real name. Looking at her display photo, I could confirm that it was her. The profile was private, and the blue follow button has to be tapped. A lot of “what ifs” were trying to stop me. I’m not the type of person who would randomly follow and accept strangers in my personal account. “This isn’t me”, I thought. I was really nervous but with closed eyes and a deep breath, I pressed it turning into a gray button for a follow request. I immediately closed the application and threw my phone across the bed.

It was a childish art of stalking, but I never felt so brave in my whole life. I have convinced myself that I won’t get hurt if I get rejected and that’s totally fine, that’s why I threw the phone right away and pretending I was busy. Well, but of course, as a man, I picked it up again. After four hours. It was so intense that I could’ve shrunk. With all hopes up, I checked my phone and visited her profile again, it’s still private and found the button back to blue and I had to resend a follow request. It doesn’t hurt at all, I told myself, though deep within, it surely did. So I resent a follow request and nope, I didn’t throw it this time. God was changing me. Every time I’d check it, it always turns back having to press the follow request button again and again. I was rejected multiple times and I wasn’t able to count it for two days. Yeah, for two days I’ve searched and waited for nothing. Yet I still think it was beautiful, because I learned not just the art of persistence, as well as the grace of accepting what God has laid before us.

The following day, I reported back to work and was told by my manager to come with them after the shift, for I’ll be joining the organizing team in the upcoming team building activity of doctors and staff. When our shift ended, I was grateful that it’s a pleasant day indeed, yet something still feels strange. This time, I checked her Instagram profile again, and saw, that it’s still private.

“Lord, I never knew this part of myself, I realized that it’s cool to ride along your roller coaster ride of emotions and the thrill of pursuing something we get rejected all the time. For one last time God, I’ll still try.” At that moment, I already knew I’m victorious, though not in the present situation. I’m victorious in the matters of the heart, I was so brave – and cool – I thought.

It was on the latter part of that one pleasant day, there was a moment I found my self resting my arms as I stand on the escalator – uneasy and clueless. I pulled my phone up from the pocket. I checked my phone and saw 6 notifications on my Instagram. I curiously tapped and then, I died inside.

She finally accepted the follow request along with five long messages. I couldn’t breathe.

P.S.

To our one and only Author, I don’t know how to thank you enough since our humble beginnings. You were sharpening every rough edges we had and helping us realize that your ways would sometimes leaves us bruised (blue), yet seen as glorious scars (gray) whenever we would look back on it. It’s indeed, amazing. You’ll always be, my First Love.

Shortly after being welcomed into a brand new year of 2020, the news of Taal Volcano’s rapid escalation of activity alert level just within a single day broke in last January 12. It all occurred like a surprise. People’s lives, plants and wildlife on the island were all badly affected by destructive lava spew and massive volcanic ash fall which emit toxic gases affecting one’s health. Unfortunately, it didn’t spare the land around its perimeter affecting nearby provinces and a number of cities in Metro Manila. To some, this devastating calamity buried not just their own homes, valuable possessions and resources for daily living, but it also caused them to lose their hope, as well as the reason for them to start over and continue on with their lives.

For this cause, a non-profit organization composed of BPI Philam Vitality members called Vitalified Community Volunteers (VCV) gathered from different provinces and some parts of Metro Manila to conduct a relief operation called “Bangon Batangas” in one of the evacuation centers in Nasugbu, Batangas last January 25 with the goal of imploring a healthy lifestyle. It was held in partnership with Christian Joy Fellowship Inc., a local church in Cavite to share the blessings and the same burden of this calling of volunteerism. With the help of generous partners and donors to raise funds and collect different forms of donation, 250 loot bags filled with goods, self-care kits and bulks of clothing were collected and packed as a gift of hope. A gift not just to sustain a living, but to rekindle and spark up life in them.

The outreach program was coordinated with Philam Life Office in Nasugbu who warmly welcomed and accommodated the team for the courtesy call and debriefing. With their help, the operation was conducted in Dr. Crisogono B. Ermita Sr. Memorial National High School. On this site, there’s around 90 family units staying in and were given safe and secured temporary shelter to be sustained by the local government. The program went well due to active and joyful cooperation by the participants. It started out with an invocation, national anthem followed by an opening remarks given by the community head to stir up everyone’s attention. Games with bunch of packed prizes were held for kids and adults, fun art activities, down to giving of relief goods until the end of the program.

While everyone was spreading the good vibes as volunteers and the affected families sharing enjoyable moments together, the volunteers were able to take time talking transparently with some of the family heads sitting on the side bench. They expressed how difficult it was for them to lose everything in an instant. Yet on the other hand, seeing resilience above their tragedy is something you can look up to them. These are people who managed to be strong and chose to move forward despite all losses. Their simple yet genuine smile and laughter reflects that their winning the good fight of faith. Just as how the qoute from a known band, Switchfoot says: “Sometimes, beautiful things came from the ashes of adversity.” True blessings are often hidden in the eyes of many. Most of the time, it is yet to be found from the ashes of life’s challenges we’re currently facing. It’s how we get up when we fall. It’s how people show humanitarian act of love even if it means sacrifice; spending precious time, lending a hand, giving to the needy, or simply, raising a hand saying “I volunteer.”

I was waiting for someone to respond with my second call, it was louder than the first, I guess.

An account of what happened exactly a year ago: the first and only time

It was my second call.

I was standing in front of an authorized-staff-only door looking for one of our patient’s relative. I knew that the first call wasn’t loud enough. Though few people heard me, but they just blankly stared at me with an invisible question marks on their faces, then turned their looks away. So I tried to call again, hoping everyone has heard me clearly by this time. Still waiting, and looking around with a face like, “anyone?”

From the last seat at the back row, someone stood up, exclaimed as she drop her earphones on the floor. I saw her having a hard time picking those up because she’s holding an opened book on her hand and was wearing a bag. Then finally, she did. She walked closer towards my direction, and this was when it all started.

I didn’t know how and why, but it seemed like the scene switched gear into a slower pace. Something clicked inside my head, the voices and sounds around became stunning echoes that were totally not understandable. My sight became narrowed and suddenly had a second vision of having the other one like a drone circling around. It’s zooming in and out of us as if there’s a creative director behind a camera. Then I was tapped back into reality as she approached me to verify if she heard it right, I responded with a stammering “yes” along with an awkward nod. I told her that the procedure was already done and that she could proceed inside. So she turned her back from me to get other stuff she left on her seat. It was my chance to shortly snap out of that weird feeling, so I tried to look around figuring out what’s even happening. But everybody was just doing their own thing, others were watching the television. I was trying to understand what the tv show was all about, but the people in the show were all sounding like an alien to me. It felt like losing in my own world, and not even one person has noticed it. It was literally just me. So I just shook head trying to convince myself that it’s nothing. I took a glance of her again as she turned her way back towards me. Her hair flipped and bounced beautifully. The clock stopped from ticking as I prematurely hold a breath. I wasn’t ready! She looked exactly like someone I’ve met before, a familiar face whom I couldn’t even remember. In a dream or in a divine picture of future. I wasn’t sure but I was also certain that it’s the first and only time I ever saw her. So who in the world exactly is this person?

While we were walking to the recovery area, man, it was just few seconds but it took me like forever to think of something I could ask her! I couldn’t ask her name because she might think that it’s inappropriate to ask it in our setting and there’s no relevance to tell me her name, she’s not even the patient. Or maybe I was just being paranoid trying not to be caught obvious that I’m interested in her with my simple words or gestures. I honestly want to know more about her but the only words came out from my mouth was, “how are you related to him?”, I was pertaining to the patient. With a heavy american accent, she answered “he’s my father”. Her voice conducted sound waves deeply, down even to my bones. I got intimidated. My being was knocked-off and shrunk in. I saw an imaginary white flag on my hand, tempted to raise and give up right there and then. But guess what, I threw it.

I left her at the patient’s bedside. During that time, I was thinking that I may not be able to see her again, because any of my co-workers can assist them through their outpatient process as I do a lot of errands at the time, including IV line insertions, transporting patients back and forth their rooms and other nursing staff responsibilities. But after approximately an hour, I was surprised to be asked by one of my colleagues the favor to please assist them with their discharge. With boiling enthusiasm, I was very glad but kept it in low key, so all I said was, “okay, sure” trying to hide my excited emotions. When I was trying to process their discharge at the reception area, a phone rang just in front of me. I had to pick it up. But the phone call was not your usual inquiry. I did not expect it to take that long. I courteously attended the caller’s concern but my attention was actually with the patient I was supposed to discharge – and to his daughter. I was just looking at her, trying to memorize how she looks like. But at one point, our eyes met! She caught me staring at her, I was embarrassed! So I randomly turned my gaze in different directions, pretending and acting like I’m focusing on my caller with my facial expressions and serious eyebrows. Well, I mean, I really am – with divided attentions.

After several minutes of phone inquiry, I hang the phone up then looked around the reception area. A split second of silence happened as my heart skipped a beat, followed by a fragmented laughter inside for my poor self. Yes, they’re already gone. They’ve been discharged and I didn’t get see them leave. Couldn’t believe how a mere phone call could let things slip.

Exhaled a sigh of missed chance. I was convinced and have accepted the fact that I might not be able to see her again. She could be just another random stranger we meet in our daily lives – people who come and go. While others stay for a lifetime, a season or just a moment – others only came to pass by. To some, we don’t really care, but some catches a heart string and pulls it tight. But who knows who?

From then on, I guess I have to move on and focus back to work, but my heart was hardly pounding. So I took a deep breath and felt at peace. Yet to my amazement, I thought I was broken to have lost it, never thought I’d actually feel the other way around.

I just found her. Man, Lord,

“Today, I just met the woman I’m going to marry.”

P.S.

To the creative director behind the scenes, I know you were smiling, even laughing as you were watching me act like an idiot. You were setting me up! But you’ve always been cheering for me like a real proud father would, your tears of joy leaves me tearing too. Your ways are always beautiful and funny in so many ways. You remained faithful when I am not. You’ll forever be my first love.

It’s not just another night.

Calm, and sound of raindrops.

It’s getting late. But before I sleep, with a lamp just beside my bed, I took a pen, flipped a page, and wrote some words for you.

Yeah, you. These words, now that I already know you.

I can still remember the day I was talking and writing to you as if you’re a person I’ve always known, I was also clueless of who you were back then at the same time. Until your soul suddenly came along, an orchestrated fate happened. You had me at one glance, I was awestruck, and if I could see through the building structures and heavenly skies above, I probably saw Jesus and your grandma smiling at us too. Sure it’s beautiful.

To You who made it all possible even if things happening in us weren’t right. To You who picked every shattered pieces and put it altogether up. To You who directed a wonderful scene without us knowing. To You who has been there all along even if we’re not close from being deserving. These words will never ever measure up to Your greatness, but really, God.. thank you.

I’m really grateful, thank you for being a blessing since the day we started talking, you’ve been, you are, and you always will. And it’s been a hundred days brighter. Yeah, today marks the 100th day of knowing you, and you’re getting more amazing. I am more captivated than ever. Not just in my sight, but more importantly, in His sight. Your soul is gold. Your heart is one precious jewel. Your eyes are sparkling as the night skies. And your smile, is more than a sunshine. Thank you for allowing yourself to be a vessel of His love, and you overflow it shamelessly. You speak of wisdom and encouragement naturally. You’re simply pure and honest. Your kindness is a pill of joy to my heart. And whenever you say bad or the not so good things about yourself, your stubbornness, your clumsiness, your weaknesses, your flaws, negatives and all, I can only smile in privilege of knowing you more, and feelings only get deeper in response. You even considered me as your best friend. You’re altogether lovely. Thank you, literally, for you. You’re my favorite song.

However, just like every story that has to go through some tough times, we’re not spared from being tested and being refined, then and only then it can be proved to be true and authentic. I am blessed that God allowed me to walk through this rough road with you. God has been speaking to my heart everyday, teaching me what and how does it really mean to love. And I’ll admittedly say that I am still in the process of learning how to embrace the difficult part of it. I remember you asked me if I ever felt that it’s hard to trust God, I answered yes. It’s always been hard to trust Him, but I do it anyway. I realized at the moment that never in my whole life He has failed to prove me that He is trustworthy. Then you asked me how far can I be patient and understanding. If I can really wait. If I can really trust God for this. You know that I’d always say yes. How can I say otherwise knowing how much God has been faithful? For that is His name. Words may have given our hearts the way towards one another, but I want you to know that you’re always free. I want you to focus and maximize your current season in life. I don’t want to limit you from spreading your wings and pursue the things that will make your heart and soul alive. I don’t want to hinder you from reaching your dreams and aspirations to make your loved ones proud. I want the best for you, because after all, since the day I got to know you, it started to become one of my heart’s biggest desire, and that’s for you to be happy. You mean a lot to me.

But these things will not stop me from pursuing you, because it all just made my heart more determined. I want to be there through your ups and downs. I always want to get your back whenever you fall. I’ll support and cheer you up. Yeah, I’m choosing to stay by your side. And I’d love to pray with you. I’ve also told you before that I want to keep you in my whole life. Well, this whole life runs and still goes on. So I’m already decided. I will still win your heart everyday.

You’re always in my thoughts. You’re treasured even from afar. I will stay foot and anchored on God’s unwavering hope and security inside me. I will obey Him while patiently waiting for His meticulously prepared time for the both of us. I totally understand that no matter how much I desire to be with you right now, it won’t make any change. But I believe in faith, that these seemingly small steps I’m currently taking will one day lead me to our crossroads. Even if faith, action and determination matters, it is only Him who will set all things right ahead of us. He will pave the way with glory from the ashes of our learnings in this life we’re currently living and momentarily savoring. So I am trusting Him, wholeheartedly.

Lastly, you’ve told me that you will wait for me too. So the message still goes.. please hold on and be patient enough. I will come, and find you again. When that time comes, I will immediately hold your hand. I will protect and lead you. We’ll walk together, side by side, and every step is a faith closer to Jesus.

…

And I want you to know that I love you, even more.

Yeah, it’s time to sleep. See you again, someday.

Goodnight.

T’was a perfectly orchestrated fate
My soul has been wandering lost in faith
Like a slob passenger on a long drive
Then a seemingly usual day arrived

It will change our lives, we were innocent
Been planned all along, a precious moment
Like a rare eclipse, your soul came along
Like a shooting star, it didn’t take long

Just a single snap when our eyes did meet
God shook this heart and swept me off my feet
It’s a scene my mind won’t ever forget
Something has struck inside like a comet

Did anyone just notice the magic?
That one short scenario was dramatic
For a second, all was silenced in sweep
Then heard inside, “here’s someone you can keep”

Not too long from the moment you have left
It felt like I’ve lost something I have kept
Man, I can’t just let go of this wonder
I promised myself, I will look for her

Like a pirate searching for a treasure
Like a lad setting out his adventure
I’ve valiantly sought you ‘til I found you
The beauty I’d always want to rescue

The way we easily get each other
I think we’ve already been together
When exactly in the past I’ve met you?
You’re like an old soul mine has always knew

How in the world I’ve seen such a beauty?
‘guess our hearts’ been planning for a treaty
Conspiring time, space, sound and every word
Converging strangers of each other’s world

Bright stars are falling for you each night
As I walk underneath a warm street light
With wishes to see you again someday
And hopes of holding your hands, as we pray

I just met the woman I’m going to marry.

Today is my rest day.

But became a kind of time travel for me, as I was able to relive some memories of my college days when I visited our university earlier this morning, I became a student again.

This is how it was.

I was set to finish the processing of my cousin’s NCLEX application requirements from our school while I am on a day off. Yes, we graduated from the same school. She’s now in California, USA, so I was asked to do it for her.

I headed to University of Makati as early as 9:00am. I was asked to wear my I.D., I just told the security guard that I am one of the alumni, so I was allowed to enter. While walking through the sidewalk, I can hear a soundtrack  coming from loud speakers at the university oval. The song that’s repeatedly playing really brings back memories, for it was the song composed and sang by one of my closest friends, a roommate before, and a brother for life, RM, he’s now working in Thailand. Can’t believe that after more than five years, I will still hear it there.

I knew it, these were the happiest days of the school year for the students, they are celebrating a two-week long Organization Festival 2018. Different booths were set up by organizations from different colleges; mini festival-like games, must-have prices, creative designs, themed costumes, free hug campaigns, food and drinks, given flyers of different events, all – makes me wanna be a student again, even just for a day.

I was able to finish all the transactions by 11:00am. Since I’m already hungry during that time, I ate along the food stalls around in student meal cost. While eating, students were starting to approach me, and gives me flyers for their event. Sounds interesting. It came into my mind to really pretend that I am still a student. So I decided to go to their respective places around the university.

First I went to the mini-theatre where Sine 101, a series of short films project created by Grade 11 students being played. I was asked to register and from which department, I told them that I am a Digital Arts student (the course that I really want when I was still a student). It was free admission. I entered and watched. Amazed, I honestly asked myself if these films were really created by Grade 11 students. Though it doesn’t look like made by a pro, the cinematography and the plot of the story are absolutely good for their level. I watched five short films, there’s romance, comedy, drama and horror. I love how the students react on every scene, they’re really living a young and carefree life, they will laugh hard, sigh sweetly and shout aloud like there’s no tomorrow. I was just there, watching, and observing them, t’was really fun.

I left the mini-theatre, then bumped with another brother, one of my closest friends and roommate before too, Marsh, he’s now a professor of Accounting. We talked shortly then part ways.

After that, I went to Speak Out, an open mic event by one of the orgs around. They just gave me a flyer when I was eating and invited me to come. I asked what’s in there, she told me that if I am looking for a place where you can just sit back, relax and listen, this is the place for me. So I went. I was then asked, again, to register and from which department, I said the same, a Digital Arts student. It has P10.00 registration fee, and asked if I want coffee or chips, for another P10.00. Alright, why not.

I went inside. The entrance was dark, welcoming warm lights, soothing background music and freely expressed designs with some dedications on wall. The ambiance is really relaxing. I really love quietness and every stills of this life, so I chose to sit on the last seat at the back. In few minutes, the coffee was served. It’s just a room. Lights were turned off with small gentle lights around, a background light behind the microphone in front, and a guitar on side. Anyone can stand up, say and sing anything they want, a spoken poetry, perform a song number or simply, a message.

Those who stood up in front were all good with their own piece. It made me admire words to write poems again. Love seems really, just in the air for these young people. There was this one small girl, I mean, she’s really born small, everyone was cheering for her and sang the song with her while waving their hands. She sang very cute and shy, then she gave her warm appreciation for all the encouragement she received through in spite of her condition, it touches everyone’s heart. That includes mine. The time spent there were smooth and chill. Again, I was just there, listening and observing. Realized that these were priceless moments for their life as students. With all the stress they have in studies, personal struggles and family concerns. They were able to escape the worries of whatever they are going through. Silly jokes, hitting and teasing each other, and genuinely sharing moments together. This made me understand, how much passion they give whatever are in front of them. This season are the most passionate years of their life. Whatever they do, they give their heart out, and rarely holds back. I think it’s something to appreciate from them.

Before they end the program, I just walked outside and went home.

Thank you Lord, for putting me once again in their shoes.

I shouldn’t have think more about this day, thus making it less complicated. T’was like these at the same time: cool but crazy; exciting then disappointing; scary with confidence; creepy and the thrill; sweat and rain drops. Unknown. Unexpected. But all, worth it.

It started at heart, this desire that is hardly wired to every man – to live an adventure.

I shortly planned to go to Baguio the day before 23rd. I decided to commute at night so that I’ll be able to arrive early in the morning and enjoy whole day of wandering around the place. While waiting some time before I set out of the trip, I started to ask some friends who might wanna join me. Mostly weren’t available and doesn’t want to go unplanned. Until three of my co-staff on rest day are willing to join me. We were too excited that we didn’t give much attention to the weather. However, to our disappointment, some friends told us that it was not advisable to go to Baguio due to reported heavy rain fall and zero visibility travel. So we did not take the risk and decided not to proceed for our safety. Though we did consider going to some other places in south like Batangas and Laguna, but the weather makes us decide not to continue anymore, as some establishments are also closed.

That’s when I learned: if God says “no” it means He wants to protect you.

I let the evening pass.

Early in the morning, I woke up with the thought of not allowing my rest day to be wasted. I needed to go somewhere. I started to look through the internet for a one-day travel near Metro Manila. It leads me to Antipolo, Rizal.

I swiftly took a bath and prepared myself for this unknown trip. Without the knowledge of where to go, but an itinerary of few interesting places in Antipolo, I set out on a trip alone.

Sounds cool, sounds crazy too.

First stop was Antipolo Cathedral Church, I just took a photo of it, and quick look of what’s inside.

Then sit for several minutes in the park just beside the church, searching places of where to go, what to do, where to eat and on how to get there questions.

Since I’m already hungry by that time, because I only ate bibingka on my way there, I started looking for My Pot Restaurant, a famous eat-all-you-can restaurant in the area due to its affordable price of P125.00 for a number of delicious filipino cuisines. From my location, I can ride a tricycle for P50.00 or an 18-minute walk. I decided to walk with the help of google map. There were two restaurants appeared on the map, one was “my pot” the other one was “mom’s pot” which has a different direction. I followed the “my pot” route, only to find out that they changed their name to “Mom’s Pot” as well as their location. Well, I have to walk back and go to the right place. I walked for more than 30 minutes, just enough for me to arrive exactly at their opening hour, 10am.

As I entered the resto, I was the only one there, and one of their staff. I asked if I can already eat. He told me that the dishes aren’t complete yet, but I can start while waiting.

I grabbed a plate and started to eat, it was all mine: unlimited chicken wings, chicken afritada, pancit palabok, beef bulalo, fried kangkong(the best), rice, spiced soup, filipino desserts atbp. Yum.

After almost an hour of eating, back and forth the buffet table, large group of people are starting to arrive and occupy the place immediately. Good thing I was an early bird, who caught the early worm. I’m done. I paid, then set to the next stop – Hinulugang Taktak.

I chose to ride a tricycle going there because I was advised by a stranger that it was too far for me to walk it. Okay, for P50.00 I was able to have a small talk with the tricycle driver, he shared some places where I can go while driving me towards my destination. I visited Hinulugang Taktak, with P30.00 entrance fee to DENR representatives: “Ikaw lang magisa?”, yes. “Estudyante?”, no. I just walked around, and took some photos of the place. Some people says they weren’t able to keep the natural beauty of the famous landmark but believes that they’re trying to. I can still remember the song I heard back in elementary “tayo na sa antipolo, at doon maligo tayo” based on what I remember, the song pertains to this place. I was standing before it with the thought of how it was drawn in a textbook of an elementary student. The sound of gushing water fall was real, with several fine drops of it coming to me like a drizzle as I stood there for a minute.

As I leave the area, I already knew where to go next, the tricycle driver told me that “white cross” was just a short walk away from there. I started to walk asking direction from random strangers. The distance and uphill gives me sweat, it also started to rain, making the rough road muddy, it was less than 30-minute walk before I reach the said place. But to my disappointment, it was only open by Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

The name of the place is Dolorosa, it’s a place of prayer known as “white cross”, because the place is actually for pilgrims, stations of the cross were set going up to the mountain, and a white cross at the end.

Anyway, I walked back along the rough road, then ride a tricycle for P50.00 going to Pinto Art Museum, known for it’s good and relaxing ambiance.

A lot of friends have been there, and were able to enjoy it. I’ll try: “for how many?”, just one. “Student?”, no. “P200.00 sir, enjoy your visit!”. Okay, thank you sir.

I actually do not know how to describe all the artworks: sculptures, paintings, art from raw materials, historical items, old and ancient alike, etc. I am not into fineness of arts to appreciate in artistic words, but I honestly enjoyed it, especially the structure of the place.

I took photos and videos of some. I did not expect the museum to be as big as 1.3 hectare, I just realized it when walking around seems tiring that I have to sit once in a while.

Before I left the museum, I looked for a place where I can go for an overnight stay. One friend suggested me to go to prayer mountain, so I looked for it in google map, and found Touch of Glory and their contact number. I called them for a reservation, they gave me options where to stay: private room, dormitory or attic. I’ll go for the cheapest one, in the attic.

I rode a tricycle for P40.00 going back to Antipolo Cathedral Church, another tricycle for P15.00 going to Cogeo, and a jeepney going to the said place for P22.00. As I ride the jeepney: “prayer mountain po?“, he said yes, so I sit beside him. He asked me why am I going to prayer mountain, and why am I going on a trip alone. He suggested a lot of place where I can go to, including the mystical cave along our way, he also shared a lot of things about Antipolo. He’s so friendly and comfortable to talk with, in every place we pass by, he’s pointing on them and explains what and how it’s called. Until we pass through an overlooking place, he pointed on it and said that it was Boso Boso, where a historical church can be found. I exclaimed that I’ve been there a couple of times. I didn’t know that the prayer mountain is just few meters away from Boso Boso. I remembered the family where we used to stay during our immersion program back on our senior year as a nursing student. So I decided to give them a visit if they will still remember me. The last time we visited them was two years ago when we volunteered as leaders to guide the 2nd batch of graduating nursing students after us.

The place brought back some memories of my college days, when I was a nursing student, though there are some changes, the ambiance still feels familiar. “As far as I can remember, this is the place, but there’s a store in front, is this really it?” I took a peek inside the store and started calling “tao po”, a little girl came out, she looks the same but grown up a little, “si mama mo?” In my thoughts, “can they still remember me?”. “Ay anak! Pasok ka, pasok. Anak magluto ka ng itlog, lutuan mo si kuya mo. Pasok ka anak, kamusta ka na? Nasaan si kai kai? Ano nga ulit pangalan mo?” Haha.

I’ve spent almost five hours with them, their warm welcome neutralized the coldness of the rainy weather. We talked, shared some memories, sang songs with an old classic guitar, prayed and ate dinner with the whole family.

I haven’t left yet but they are already excited for me to come back together with my brothers and sisters. And so do I, they actually highlighted my day without them knowing it.

I felt God has graced me with guidance, peace and confidence through them and all the strangers I’ve met as I travel. I was alone yet He allowed me to feel companionship.

They didn’t want me to leave anymore and asking me stay there overnight for my safety, because it was already late evening, and it’s very seldom for a tricycle to pass by that goes out the main road. But I have to because I already asked for a reservation at prayer mountain for my accommodation. I left the family with a smile, full of gratitude on how they have treated me, and a bag of fruits called rambutan from their land. They want me to bring some more but I just brought enough, for it will be hard for me to take all of those on a trip. They waved their good byes, take good cares, and please come backs. Everything was genuine and heartfelt.

After a ride on a tricycle going out of Boso Boso, I walked along a dark wide road. You can see not even a small light, except big and loud trucks and fast jeepneys that pass by. Every thin sound will scare you, anyone can appear on your side, even vehicles you do not know if they will stop in front of you. Random scary thoughts covered me as I turned on the flashlight of my phone, walking in confidence of His protection, until I saw some signs of life from a distance, “thank God“. I continued to walk til I reach the Touch of Glory prayer mountain.

It’s still raining when I arrived, I asked the guard wearing a raincoat, for my accommodation, “ikaw lang sir?”, I said yes. They pointed me to the attic. The place was dark, they only have few lights turned on for the path. I entered the church, slid the sliding door open slowly, wasn’t sure if I’m going to the right place, it was really dark, I’m just using the flashlight of my phone, it was creepy and gives a lot of thrill for me. So I decided to take a video footage of it as I slowly walked through hallways and took steps going up the stairs to attic, there are signages and arrows posted on every corner of the wall, so just have to follow it. Upon reaching the last step of the stairs, there’s a whole body mirror in front of me, seeing myself with the flashlight on. On my right was a door that reads “female attic” and on my left, another door that reads “male attic”. “Please close the door slowly”. I opened the door, the room was dark, turned the lights and fan on. I was the only one there, with a number of double decks, stairs and a mirror. I put down my things, changed clothes and slippers.
I sat for a while, felt the soft bed for a minute: that was a tiring trip. I wanted to take a shower, but I don’t think I’ll be able to rest well on the attic. So I went downstairs, asked the guard if there’s someone in the male dormitory, and if it’s okay for me to check it and transfer there. He said yes, and there were five occupants that night. Upon checking, I thought that it will be more safe for me to stay in the dormitory than in attic, so I get back up to the attic, got my things and transferred to the dormitory. I took a shower, laid myself down to bed, and prayed a goodnight. This sums up that unexpected journey I have had before my day.

Early in the morning, t’was 23rd of August, also my 23rd birthday. I woke up, took another shower, went inside the prayer cell no. 23 and spent an hour inside praying and giving thanks to God for another year of life.

I walked around and saw this group of men having their morning devotion inside the auditorium, I entered and pass by them. I hiddenly listened as their leader prayed. I was there in the back stage, praying with them when I felt the touch of God, I felt as if they were praying for me, welling in tears, as my hands wiping it off.

I was thanking God of His glorious grace poured into me. The moment we all live for, a moment of face-to-face, His embrace were so tangible and real. The same feeling when I first encountered Him. There’s no place I’d rather be.

Before I went home, I explored the prayer mountain around: prayer cells, prayer huts, prayer garden, the pond with lots of Koi fishes and a turtle.

I paid for the accommodation which is P350.00 for an overnight stay, not bad. Then I went home straight to Cavite to spend the rest of the day with my family.

I do not know how to end it. But yeah, all was worth it.