Stuck in Paradise for the Foreseeable
Oct. 29th, 2025 05:16 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
fairestcatSo, as I mentioned in my Festivids letter, I am currently in Hawaii. Hilo to be specific. I have been here since October 10th and I genuinely have no idea when I'll get to go home.
My mother was diagnosed with congestive heart failure five years ago, but this fall she got significantly worse and also developed pneumonia. She was in the hospital for two and a half weeks and is now in a short-term rehab working on getting back her ability to do exciting things like walking across a room without getting shaky-legged and out of breath and using the bathroom unaided.
I'm in an itty bitty postage stamp sized airbnb room in Hilo, since my mom's place is a nearly two-hour drive away. I can't go home until we figure out what happens next for my mom. I don't think she can go back to the place she's been sharing with my sister. My sister is also disabled and not really able to help my mom with stuff, their tiny house is cramped and crowded, has built-in steps and is a constant tripping hazard, and honestly my mom and sister are driving each other completely mad.
Hawaii is beautiful and all, there are certainly worse places I could be stuck indefinitely, but I really want my own bed and my own spouses and my own pets and my own time zone.
My mother was diagnosed with congestive heart failure five years ago, but this fall she got significantly worse and also developed pneumonia. She was in the hospital for two and a half weeks and is now in a short-term rehab working on getting back her ability to do exciting things like walking across a room without getting shaky-legged and out of breath and using the bathroom unaided.
I'm in an itty bitty postage stamp sized airbnb room in Hilo, since my mom's place is a nearly two-hour drive away. I can't go home until we figure out what happens next for my mom. I don't think she can go back to the place she's been sharing with my sister. My sister is also disabled and not really able to help my mom with stuff, their tiny house is cramped and crowded, has built-in steps and is a constant tripping hazard, and honestly my mom and sister are driving each other completely mad.
Hawaii is beautiful and all, there are certainly worse places I could be stuck indefinitely, but I really want my own bed and my own spouses and my own pets and my own time zone.
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Date: 2025-10-30 03:58 am (UTC)Caregiving in these sorts of situations is SO VERY FRAUGHT. No good choices, just less-bad ones.
You have my heartfelt empathy, and a whole lotta wish-I-had-a-magic wand and California Healing Vibes™ for both your mom's body (such as it may help, at this point) and for your SOUL (may it be so may it be so, may it ever, EVER, BE SO.)
❤️💔❤️
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Date: 2025-10-30 04:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-10-30 04:52 am (UTC)Well isn't that awkward and miserable.
May it become well-resolved!
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Date: 2025-10-30 10:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-10-30 11:01 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-10-30 11:36 am (UTC)(I keep having just a flicker of cognitive dissonance when you mention the situation, because "Hawai'i=FAVORITE PLACE IN THE WORLD" is embedded deeply in my heart, so there's always this moment of "Hilo! Yay--WAIT, NO, NOT GOOD THIS TIME." ^^; But if you pass through Puna, give it a little wave for me. That's where I got married.)
(This in no way lessens my sympathy for the yearning to be HOME. ;_;)
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Date: 2025-10-30 11:54 am (UTC)Warm thoughts
Date: 2025-10-30 01:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-10-30 04:50 pm (UTC)*hugs*
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Date: 2025-10-30 05:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-10-30 07:51 pm (UTC)Thinking of you and yours.
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Date: 2025-10-30 10:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-11-04 01:22 am (UTC)