Inspired by primalfire's post, "Magic is What Mind Does:"

We manifest in tandem not only with conditioning, but with every other consciousness in the universe, to put it mystically-- to put it more practically, our thoughts influence a lot in our own being, but often have little effect on the rest of the world.

Many, many things happen without any discernible influence from any human mind... we have some influence over whether we will be conscious at sunrise, but not on whether the sun rises.

Some things *do* happen over which we, as individuals, have no control-- except that we can have a lot of control over our reactions.

I have seen many cheerful, optimistic people who have terrible things happen to them-- often that's how people allow themselves to become complaining types. Refusal to think of loss, pain, etc., is in many cases irresponsible and pathological.

I have known people who were successful in almost every way *except* that they had a serious attitude problem.

It isn't any sort of science (or common sense) to suggest that one has complete control over one's environment. And actually, that's a very good thing-- because people aren't able to handle controlling everything.

We shape our lives, but we do not control them utterly.

I believe in the reality and holiness of the physical world. Although there are certainly levels of reality other than the physical, I don't think they matter more.

I have known deeply religious and/or spiritual people who radiate peace and joy. Often they radiate that peace and joy as a beacon in surroundings that are incredibly awful-- poverty, squalor, racism, disease, ignorance, and neglect in their old age. The ones I respect, as opposed to the ones I see as simply those who've found a drug in Jesus (or Krishna, or Whom/Whatever), are ones who are a beacon through their actions to make the horribleness better.

*Do* we actually choose to be happy? I doubt it. A happy disposition may be gained, but the feeling that "everything will be all right" is as much a result of an advantageous body chemistry as enlightenment. Happiness, pleasure, and the heights and depths of joy are all gifts to be savored and shared, something that can be refused but not something that's always available to choose.

"so, real happiness and joy is a deep seated sensation, a gut feeling where everything is OK, no matter what"

IMX people who believe everything is okay aren't as much help as people who accept that many things are rotten but it's possible to make things better. There's a little resentment there that I need to work on, but I think that I define happiness and joy as both more "realistic" (meaning, in touch with the material world and its limitations) and relational. If I reach perfect bliss through disengagement, what is the difference between that bliss and delusion? If I am happy while a child (or my friend) cries, what of the deep joy of love?

"It is true we shape our life, but do not control them utterly. We cannot control the external events, yet we can guide our own internal world to remain calm, even when the external is in chaotic flux."

That makes more sense to me, because it is not an absolute. I do think in absolutes at times, but I actually am pretty sure absolutes don't describe the real universe.